Chocolate

Hi guys :)

Tomorrow is an important day. The kids are out of school, so we're going to see Tron. We're also going to buy a box of chocolate for Zach in Dr. Saltzman's office (the ortho) for moving mountains to make sure I got the appointment with the neurologist. If he hadn't, I'd be waiting for months. Six months. They had lost my file and he made sure they had what they needed to expedite my appointment.

A box of chocolates is the least I can do for my hero.

I've looked up my symptoms. It could be stress. It could be MS

I have an appointment!

Hi m'dears...

I've not been updating my weight - it's been as high as 121.4 and as low as 119. I'm fine with this, though my pants fit better when I'm more like 114-118. I'm NOT stressing about this though. Right now I'm focusing on making sure I'm eating a balanced diet supportive of all my systems. So far so good. I'm not carb sensitive at the moment. My body just seems to want to be at this weight.

I spoke with the neurological center this morning and was so pleased. She said my referral had somehow gotten lost in the system at first, then they found it, then they thought it was too vague to assign me to a specialist, then they re-reviewed it and saw that it was in fact specific enough. I am going in for a neuro-muscular consult on February 7th at 7:45 am. 7:45!!!! I won't complain - the next available was February 22. I googled the doctor and rheumatoid arthritis is one of his specialties. I wonder if that could be what this is - it is common for something like this to come on suddenly in a person my age. It certainly came on suddenly.

I love you guys.

Checking in

No real news. I won't hear back from the doctor until Tuesday or Wednesday. I'll be sure to keep you all posted. It's really wonderful having all of you here to talk to.

I'm calmer. I still have panic attacks, but they're less intense and not as many.

On my collage I have "miraculous results" and "natural healing" as well as "Fear nothing". I'm focusing on those words.

To top all of this off, we found out when we got back from our trip that my husband's father has cancer. They didn't tell us on the trip because they didn't have any definitive answers at the time and didn't want us to worry. It's funny, because there was a melancholy feeling that hung over the entire trip, especially when we were all opening presents. The good news is, they have isolated the tumor and it is operable. He goes to the hospital Wednesday for his operation and they will remove the entire tumor. There should be no need for chemo. I hope this is enough of a wake up call for my husband to quit smoking.

Okay, now it's time for the daily laugh...

Got a call about the neurologist

Hi guys! First, thanks for checking in with me. I can't express my gratitude enough. I really can't. I had a horrible day today with full blown panic attacks, which I've experienced before, but I've learned to know what they are. Now with the possibility that I have a lesion on my brain or MS, I had the horrible fear it wasn't a panic attack. Guess what THAT did for my stress level??

Good news. I got a call from the medical assistant to the orthopedic surgeon this evening and they are doing everything they can to find out what tests they need to order for me since the neuro department couldn't take my case for another 6 months. God bless these guys. Really. I will most likely first get an MRI to rule out a brain tumor or lesion. If that is clean, then I will most likely get a spinal tap to rule out MS. I am scared silly about the testing, but am so much more relieved knowing that they care and will get to the bottom of this.

I keep looking at my family and feel my heart break. I know I need to be positive. This could be as simple as stress. The acupuncturist (who is a licensed MD in China) kept assuring me that this is most likely nothing to be worried about. We just have to rule these things out.

In the meantime, I continue to look for humorous websites to relieve my stress. My favorite 2 right now are http://damnyouautocorrect.com/ and http://whenparentstext.com/ . The laugh of the day though came from this video. LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!

Love you too!!!



PS - After all these years, you are part of my family and I'm so grateful for you.

Update post acupuncture

I had an AMAZING experience with the doctor. She listened, wasn't intimidating, nor judgmental. She did make me promise to make an appointment with a neurologist to rule out a lesion or MS. They are booked until June, but right now my orthopedic surgeon is trying to work out being able to order some tests and an MRI to rule out or confirm before I need to see a neurologist.

I'm nervous, I won't kid you, but I'm taking steps to make sure I'm okay.

She worked on my stress and my blocked energy and I immediately felt so much better stress wise. I have 2 more treatments a week apart to get a grip on my energy. I'm also adding in more complex carbs to my diet. I have felt so out of balance and I knew intuitively she was right. I came home and had a piece of Julian carb smart bread with salsa and cheddar cheese melted on top when I came home and I'm grilling some asparagus.

I've been afraid to exercise because of my foot drop experiences (I didn't know there was an official term for it!) but she told me not to be afraid - start yoga, even if it's only a couple days a week.

She assured me that the chances of anything really being wrong with me at my age are very small.

Thanks for checking in on me! I really appreciate it.

XOXOX

Off to check on you

118.3 - small update

Today was the first day in 2011 that I've weighed in. I've been afraid to. My jeans are a little tight and I've been over indulging. We got some frightening news about my father-in-law and I'm afraid I don't deal with stress well. I truly need to get a grip. Hopefully everything will be okay, but no matter what I'm not doing anyone any good not taking better care of myself.

Speaking of that, I can't remember if I posted about my weird foot issues. My right foot is slightly swollen and has been for about a year and a half. It's had an MRI and there is *nothing* wrong with it. About half a year ago I was wearing shape ups and suddenly I lost the ability to flex that foot up. It resolved itself after a few days. I assumed it had something to do with the swelling. Well, the day I did my collage this year, I was sitting on the floor to do so (wood floor). I was sitting awkwardly on my left side when doing so. Well, my left foot somewhat fell asleep, and when I got up off the floor, I realized I was having trouble walking. Now my LEFT foot was no longer able to flex. It's better now, though not 100%. Needless to say, I'm a little worried about exercising and this is not helping my stress.

Since Western medicine doesn't appear to be providing any answers, I'm making an appointment with an acupuncturist who also works with Chinese medicine.  I'll let y'all know.

I hope all of you are doing well! I'm off to check in on all y'all!

XOXOX

Happy New Year!

Helloooooo my peeps! I am wishing you all the very best this 2011! Today is 1.1.11 - LOVE IT!

My collage is done! To see it all at once, click on the picture. You'll notice the background on the blog is now the new collage.

XOXOX!