Thursday, October 8, 2009

VLCD #5 - 123.4 - exactly at pre-load weight

Either I was closer to 124 yesterday or I gained .6 pounds. This was pre-BM, but my BMs are another story. I have them all the time... but only a very little at a time. I'd love to have one decent one a day instead of this weirdness. I hate to give you too much information. I am thinking of taking some smooth move tea tonight before bed to see if I can't "consolidate" :).

I knew this round would be drastically different from my last given how close I am to my goal. I've got 22 more VLCDs ahead of me (I mixed enough for 28 days and had 2 loading days). I'm at 123.4 today. Certainly I'll at the very least reach the hundred teens. I won't do another round, that I can tell you.

If I manage to lose half a pound a day, which I'm most certainly not counting on, I would get to 112.4. I'd love that, but then again, I'm not counting on it.

Lavenderdiva suggested lifecaps. I bought a bottle last year but didn't dare try them as they were so new to being experimented with. People reported great losses but no one had yet tried stabilizing afterwards. I've since heard nothing but good reports from those who have had successful P3s and P4s since. Some said they didn't work at all but no one has complained of stabilization issues. Since I've already bought them, I think I'll break them out since I am beginning to experience a bit more hunger. At this point I don't think it could hurt.

This round was intended for me to get as close to a healthy BMI as I could. It's turned into something more though. It may be my most important round yet. This has become a pattern interrupt for me. This last year, layers of the onion have been peeled away not only physically, but emotionally as well. I was left raw, with a lot of feelings and opinions I didn't know I was allowed to have. Couple that with the economy and what it did to my business, my finances, my parents and their finances, I didn't cope very well. This took a toll on me physically which has turned this round into a healing round and a chance for me to handle things differently.

My kids are dancing around the kitchen getting ready for school, so rather than try to explain further, I better go. It will be easier when they're not here to go into any more depth.

VLCD Day 5, 123.4 (+.6 from yesterday, 0 from pre-load weight, 11.4 from goal)


Caitlin Murphy said...

I feel so free on my blog and while reading other's, too. I don't know if that is a good thing or not: to unabashedly tell all to the world, but it can make a huge difference,. a release in essence. I am working up the courage to tell a little behind my emotional and relationship issues, which I am wading through inadvertently through HCG. I hope you have a wonderful day and want to tell you again- thanks for the help and encouragement! Happy losing!

helderheid said...

Thank you so much! Actually, it's the emotional journey that I'm exploring through my blog. I have a calorie and weight tracker for the rest. The blog for me is a chance to work on the emotional side of this journey. It had the most wonderful side effect of gaining support from other bloggers!

I think working through the emotional stuff is as important if not more so than just releasing the weight. I have a lot to say and it will all come out in the blog. Relationship issues being way up there. Still, I know that working through it here will only help heal. :) Thanks for your support!

nikkispower said...

I've done alot of self-discovery with this protocol as well. It really has helped me be real with myself about why I chose to try to eat my pain away.

This blogging though for me has helped me to stay with it because of the encouraging posts I read.

Successful losing.

Anonymous said...

I really enjoy blogging and the support system that I have built because of it. It has helped me to stay focused and not give up when I want to throw in the towel. Hope you enjoy the day.